"its my fucking 21st!!!!!!!!!!!!"............"ya bitch we know"

once again writing a post because i dont want to do work. this is the best procrastination tool ever. so all i really have to talk about is my 21st. in paris nobody gives a flying fuck bc theyve all been drinking booze since they were on the tit. even though my father has maintained a relatively liberal policy on bevs with me for a long while (and more recently momma kimster as well thanks to douglas) ive still held on to an american mindset of drinking. im pretty sure that we have so many binge drinking problems in the states bc its so restricted for the youth. i mean its a little ridiculous that an 18 year old can go die for their country but cant enjoy a beer. ok getting way off topic but you get my point. so anywayssss back to me bc thats what this blog is all about BAH. so regardless of me being in france, i wanted a real american 21st. i wanted to drink too much and make lots of bad decisions and want to die the next day. i didnt really know if that was going to happen though bc my bday fell on a monday. its hard going out on mondays but even worse in paris bc there is literally nothing going on. i decided to just do my own thing anyways. my friends and i made it to our fav spot beho for happy hour. we immediately ordered two drinks each bc the eight hour happy hour was almost over. for some reason we can never get our shit together on time. i decided on long islands due to their drinkability as well as the high percentage of alcohol to mixer. it seemed after my 3rd that it was a bad decision bc i didnt feel shit. i was a little cranky. the bartender was nice though and extended happy hour for cocktails another hour. after we had had our fill of 3,50 stellas and 4,50 long islands...and a random gin and tonic?.....we peaced out to go to hideout. we wanted cheap pints and hideout is the place. being a monday there were approximately....ZERO ppl in the bar. i think at this point is when all the long islands hit me and i said bai bai to reality. hideout was a BLAST. hunter and i attempted to "shag" again. no we did not try to fuck in the middle of the bar. apparently the shag is a dance thing? i dont think its made its way to wm but i think we could make it happen. some wasted frenchies tried to come in but they got hardcore bounced. they sang me happy birthday before they left though. then begged me to let them buy me a drink so that they could stay. im pretty sure i just laughed in all their faces and continued to love on my pint. then the bartender made them say baiiiii and they were escorted out like misbehaving toddlers. we wrapped up at hideout and decided to make a return to the illustrious banana cafe. we hadnt gone back since oriental night which was special for everyone. the coat check boy was faboosh and wished me a happy bday. upon entering ALL MY JAMS were playing so i was tearing up the dance floor solo. the resident drag queen decided she wanted to...i dunno what her point was but basically she lifted my skirt. i tried to retaliate but seeing as she was wearing a very tight mesh dress with accompanying thong and bra it didnt go well. i returned to my solo on the dance floor (where were kate and hunter iunno? dancing with me? who knows) kate had to go bai bai bc she had a test but hunter stayed...even though he also had a test. i think he went bai bai to the real world at this point too. i dont want to go into more details but that night banana cafe won and hunter and i both LOST. i got home google phoned katie h. at around 6:30 but had to go soon after. my trash can was calling me. it continued to call me until around 4 pm the next day. tuesday was a sad day. my bed and i got really close though. also THANK GOD FOR SVU ONLINE. something about olivia and elliot catching pedos and rapists makes my heart sing. i did not even make it to dinner even though its approximately 10 feet away from my bed. pathetic. in the end all the pain was worth it bc i had a true american 21st....even though it was in paris. also cost WAY TOO MUCH. but its ok im just going to not eat anything until april except what mme gives me and CROUS (...like the caf but impossible to truly explain). the boozing continues as im going to champage on saturday. i havent actually read the itinerary but i hope its fun. or else thats a whole saturday wasted. have to be at that shit by 8:30! and now my followers (the few but loyal except for katie bc shes a horrible friend and doesnt love me enough to actually read any of these...i guarantee you she will see this in about 2 months and be offended hahahahah <3) i might actually do work...nah dawg gonna stumble upon until dindin.